QUIZ: What Kind of Covid-19 Vaccine Are You?

Because it’s not just a shot. It’s who you are.

Vaccines are right around the corner! Sort of, depending on how you define “corner.” Also “right around.” Luckily, there are quite a few different ones — some from Russia, some from that baby lotion company, some from Amazon, I assume. So how do you know which is the right one for you? Luckily, you probably have a while before you have to make that call. Even more luckily, you likely will have zero say in what vaccine you get.

Still, let’s consider the possibility that you do have a say in what goes in your arm (magical thinking is the key to our new reality). How do you know what vaccine matches your personality type? We’ve developed a quiz below to find out if you’re a Pfizer,

What’s your overall effectiveness rate in life?

What are you looking for in a relationship?

How well do you respond to unforeseen circumstances?

How many shots do you usually take in a six week period?

How available are you?

What’s your ideal night on the town?

How old are you?

When can I see you again?

Who would be most likely to play you in a movie?

Mostly 1s: You’re a Moderna! You were quick to the market and highly effective — we salute you!

Mostly 2s: You’re a Pfizer! Often confused up with your Moderna pal, you strive to stand on your own merits. You’ve been around since 1849, after all!

Mostly 3s: You’re an AstraZeneca! You took your time sweet time getting here (relatively….still one of the fastest vaccines in history), but you’re only asking people to get one shot of you.

Mostly 4s: You’re Johnson & Johnson! As a vaccine, you’re more effective than baby powder, which is saying a lot, because baby powder solves a lot of problems. But you’re not perfect.

Mostly 5s: You’re the Russian vaccine, Sputnik! You showed up super early and not fully tested, s, we didn’t trust you at all. Then again, we probably wouldn’t have anyway. Cheers!

An LA-based writer and stand up comic. I write for a bunch of places and I wrote a book, follow me on Twitter @ginnyhogan_ to learn more

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store